Feeling the Love

This week in my classes I've been teaching students about the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI). After watching this video six times, I am really starting to appreciate my type - ENFJ - and apply the types to people in my work, personal and teaching worlds. I wonder if Pisceans, like myself, tend to be ENFJs - Extroverted, Intuition, Feeling and Judging?

The inspiration for writing this post was today's early-morning phone call with Hisun. She has a tendency to call me at 8am on Sundays and usually I am still in day-dream land and not in the mood to talk. Today, I surprised her and called at 8am and she didn't pick up! A switch of roles. When she called back you could hear the amusement in her voice, "you called me on a Sunday morning!" She was thrilled that I reached out and thought of her.

I'm realizing that you know true friends, those who you want to wrap into your world blanket by the warm-fuzzies you get when you connect. As I know more about my type, and appreciate other types, the more I can make room for people who are warmth generators. Sometimes you just have to re-mix your letters to make sure the Judger doesn't take over the feeler.

Cautious

Reading this blog and following my adventures one might not believe that I am a cautious person. Cautiousness is a realization I had this week when thinking about my closest friendships. I've been thinking in particular how I am very cautious about touching people and letting them touch me. My friends know that when someone reaches out to me I instinctively pull away. It is a reaction I would like to change and I'm not sure where it comes from but it is not new.

Recently I was sitting very close to my friend Nicole at a jazz club and our knees were just about touching. I was using all my strength to hold my knee back from touching hers. She actually leaned over to me and said, "I feel strange but I'm holding my knee back so that it doesn't touch yours, because I know you aren't comfortable with that kind of touching. Is it OK if my knee touches yours?" This wasn't some kind of come-on it was a friend being sensitive to my sensitivities.

I wonder what is at the root of this cautiousness about touching?

Year of Research and Development

Over the past few weeks I've been checking in with my core peeps. These are my women friends who are eager to hear what I'm doing and how I'm feeling. Each offers honest feedback and helps me reflect on my past, present and future - without judging my various twists and turns.

The big revelation: I've accomplished the Year of Amy I am now in the Year of Research and Development. Through these various conversations with the Core Peeps (notice, this is now a title) I've recognized that I am on the road to something quite fantastic both personally and professionally.