Massage Under the Apple Tree

Once again Dan gave me a massage under the apple tree in our back yard. Yes, I am so spoiled here in sunny, warm California. He found all the painful spots - many from my bike crash eight weeks ago. We both agree that my knee injury is healing beautifully, my bike tattoo.

Usually I like to zen out and feel the massage full-on but this time we chatted on and on about life, the universe and everything. Turns out Dan is also a 1969 baby. He couldn't believe I was 40 - like I'm well preserved despite my age. As soon as we discovered we are of the same Re-Gen-Xer year our conversation got so much "more real". In fact, he said it was the most spiritual conversation he's ever had with a client. Clearly, he's not reading this blog.

Dan and I agree that age is a state of mind and we live our lives guided by our creative spirits. His takes him skateboarding and mine takes me bike riding.

A ReGenXer Contemplates 40

A few months ago my aunt asked me how I was planning to celebrate my 40th birthday next year. The question took me by huge surprise as I hadn't even been thinking about my "big 40". Gosh, I was just settling into being 39.

After getting over the initial shock of the question I started experiencing a series of emotions. Disappointment came up. My dreams of starting a family had been derailed, temporarily, with the end of my marriage. But that feeling of loss was soon replaced by anticipation. What would my life look like in 6 months?



Now I am seeing my March 8 birthday as a benchmark. It is a start, end and continuation date. This relates to the articulation of my personal and professional goals. What drives me forward? What gets my mojo pumping?



Ultimately I am working towards a huge and ongoing celebration of me and my friends who are, in bulk, also turning 40 next year. I propose that we embrace the year, savor our friendships, rejoice in our evolution and reaffirm our dreams.



Bring it on!

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Riding the Lifecycle

While creating my new website and uploading articles I had written I came across the book review of Nonprofit Lifecycles: Stage-Based Wisdom for Nonprofit Capacity by Susan Kenny Stevens. This is one of my favorite books because it uses a methodology taken from social work. Usually I apply it to analyzing organizational development but now as I reflect on my ReGenXer life and how so many of my friends are also going through life changes I can see the social application of Kenny Steven's Lifecycle theory.

Kenny Stevens states that organizations go through lifecycle stages that are categorized as: Idea, Start-up, Growth, Maturity, Decline, Turnaround, and Terminal. In fact, each function of the organization also goes through these stages - financial management, governance, client services, publications, membership, etc. The steepest portions of the curve are the two ends - Idea and Terminal. The apex is Maturity. Turnaround is the critical stage at which it is determined if the organization or function can be brought back around to Growth or should be Terminated.

I'm telling you all this as a backdrop to my own life, which interestingly seems to be paralleling the lifecycles of so many of my closest friends. We are in relationships and employment that has hit the Decline stage. Perhaps it is a late 30s or early 40s stage that everyone hits (mid-life? mid-career?) or possibly it has something to do with ReGenXers, our lifestyles or even our career paths? Maybe it is the impact of globalization? We hit that Decline and do everything we can to Turnaround the relationship or employment. Some of us get stuck there for a long time - because of obligations and the ripple impact of our looming choice. Perhaps in previous generations people would have stayed at Decline and never hit Terminal. Not us, we make changes no matter how unconventional, impactful and challenging.

Something about ReGenXers encourages us to look inside and find a Turnaround in parallel with Terminal. We end our marriages, leave our jobs, move to different countries, find new ways to build support networks and start over. We are fearless about this process, even if it is incredibly painful. Is it that we have a strong need to for self-actualization?

So here I am Turning around again and I am not alone. Friends and family connected electronically across the planet gently offer each other support as we develop new Ideas and move into new Start-ups. We nurture each other's Growth and intertwine our lives.

Presidential Hopes Smashed

CNN reported today that comedian Stephen Colbert has been pulled off the presidential primary ballot in South Carolina, the only state in which he was running for President. Apparently Obama supporters lobbied to have his name removed as there was concern he would pull votes from their shared market.

Here's the article link.


I am of mixed feelings. Yes, it was a joke, but somehow I found it really heartening that Colbert was running and with enthusiasm. There's even a campaigning application on facebook which you can add to your profile page. I liked that people were getting excited.

It somehow lessens Obama in my eyes - that his people were concerned about this competition. He now just seems like any other politician. I liked him because he was one of us - a ReGenXer. But now, he feels like another establishment dude with a big machine behind him.