New Paths Forged

Just now doing the dishes I had a realization - it is a challenge being brave. I keep realizing that I am 40, single once again, living on my own, running my own consulting practice, working from home, and am somehow making it all work while being strong. Plus, I'm reaching my professional goals with all kinds of new projects and teaching opportunities.

But my life isn't the norm. All around me people are married/coupled, have houses, kids, pets, cars, and jobs. I see these relationships and wonder if those paths should or could have been mine. I have so much freedom but also not many role models. Certainly I am not alone, especially in a major metropolitan area with tons of creative, intelligent and motivated people. Many of my friends have evolved into the same life path. We look to each other for support, connection and family. I am curious to see if we are actually leaders of a trend - a new choice of lifestyle.

The new term Cougar has been mentioned - fierce, older, single women on the prowl. I take offense to this statement. I am certainly not on the prowl, nor am I desperate. Frankly, I've realized that life doesn't have to be filled with compromises; difficult situations can be changed and new paths forged. This isn't easy but it does allow me to live free and strong.

Massage Under the Apple Tree

Once again Dan gave me a massage under the apple tree in our back yard. Yes, I am so spoiled here in sunny, warm California. He found all the painful spots - many from my bike crash eight weeks ago. We both agree that my knee injury is healing beautifully, my bike tattoo.

Usually I like to zen out and feel the massage full-on but this time we chatted on and on about life, the universe and everything. Turns out Dan is also a 1969 baby. He couldn't believe I was 40 - like I'm well preserved despite my age. As soon as we discovered we are of the same Re-Gen-Xer year our conversation got so much "more real". In fact, he said it was the most spiritual conversation he's ever had with a client. Clearly, he's not reading this blog.

Dan and I agree that age is a state of mind and we live our lives guided by our creative spirits. His takes him skateboarding and mine takes me bike riding.