Creating a Life Free of Over-Commitment Clutter

"Think in concrete terms so that you can vividly picture what it would be like to live in a clutter-free space."  - Marie Kondo

Earlier this week I was chatting with my parents about over-commitment. We have a habit, perhaps even a practice, of making promises because our nature is to see the potential in almost everything and everyone. People love Kweskins because we follow-through, rarely drop the ball, and ensure that we get the job done - with excellence. In fact, I think we thrive on seeing people happy, fulfilled and us getting a pat on the back.

However, I would equate this life-long practice with being a giant ball of Velcro that becomes wobbly with all kinds of attachments. Let's call it over-commitment clutter. Some would call it the need to set boundaries or just learn to say, "thank you for asking, but no thank you."

On our family phone call my mom mentioned The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo and how she is expanding the concept beyond stuff and also considering all of her commitments. This book has been sitting on my shelf for almost a year, set aside after I had read the intro, and now I've been inspired to pick it up again.

With this new filter in mind, decluttering my commitments, I read Marie's statement at the top of this post and inserted "life" into "space" and a feeling of clarity began to bubble up in my over-crowded thoughts. "Yes, I can do this!"

How appropriate on Labor Day Weekend to give some details to a vivid picture of what my life can be if it is over-commitment clutter free. Yesterday, I was helping my students identify goal-setting success indicators. How do you know when you have reached a goal? What might you be seeing, hearing, doing, and saying? This further anchors the goal into a positive framing. So, as part of my practice this vivid picture I will include the success indicators.

A Full House

My apartment easily converts from a one person abode into a four person hotel. Grammie, Mom and Dad are visiting and I've set my folks up in the living room. Some of my friends think that this is outrageous, but we are very Kweskin which means we like to be cheap and cheerful - or what we call, casual.

Grammie and I are actually sharing a bed. It is a little bit weird, I suppose, but not really. When I asked Grammie if this would be OK with her she said, "I haven't shared a bed with someone in years, I wonder how it will be." Well, I think it is turning out fine. She sleeps soundly and I'm getting use to sharing my bet with someone since it has been years for me as well.

We had numerous cousins over for dinner last night and now know that my place can seat at least nine for dinner. However, this requires that the bedroom be loaded with all other extra furniture and you have to pass through that tornado zone to get to the bathroom. Never a dull moment in the Kweskin household.

Kweskin is a Cool Name

Yesterday I spent the afternoon and evening with my cousins Ben and Corrina. Three Kweskin cousins in one house was super cool. Corrina has all kinds of Kweskin family photos hanging on her walls and it was spectacular to see cousins I've never met.

Growing up I didn't know Corrina and hearing all her interesting stories and unexpected overlaps in our lives (we both had Louise for a middle name) was fascinating. I had this realization - Kweskin is a cool name and I dig being related to funky folks. We're all a bit creative and live unusual lives.

Ellis Island website lists passengers

A Kweskin cousin contacted me to say that you can use the Ellis Island website to research passengers. Visit http://www.ellisisland.org/, choose the passenger search function, type in your search term and you're on the way to accessing some pretty remarkable information. The site is free, you just need to register.

You can see the names of passengers, residence, year they arrived, their age, view their passenger record, ship manifest and even a ship image. The documents, which are PDFs of original records, can be purchased on the site. Breathtaking.

Worst Album Ever - Discovered by Matthew Kweskin

My brother Matt sent me a link to the absolute worst album ever - Meet the Barkers on WFMU's blog.

Best track - We Can Work it Out. Features not only dogs but also cats and ducks.