April 4, 2006

Katie Holmes Prematurely Jumps the Shark

Jump the Shark, the pop culture expression used to describe when something, usually a television show such as a sitcom, has hit its lifespan and then goes beyond. It is based on the Happy Days episode in which Fonzy jumps over the sharks on waterskis. There is an entire website dedicated to determining when shows jump the shark.

Stephen and I use this term to describe many things that have gone beyond their useful lifespan. It could be used to describe a restaurant that use to be great and for some reason isn’t any more, or, a car that was cool and has now become un-cool for some reason. Almost always it describes a form of entertainment or leisure.

Katie Holmes, the actress who is now preggers with Tom Cruise’s “love child” has most certainly jumped the shark. Holmes, who I have never seen in television or film until tonight when I saw Thank You for Smoking, has effectively managed to jump the shark with her life and career.

In the darkened theater, when the few early-evening film-goers, myself one of them, saw Holmes’ name in the opening credits, there was a audible sigh of disgust. Like myself, the other audience members were probably thinking, “gosh, I thought this was supposed to be a good film, but look who I have to see, yet again, in my face. Well, at least William. H. Macy makes up for her presence."

Unfortunately, her role in the film was painful to watch considering her current life situation. Often I’ve thought of her as the victim of Cruise’s mid-life crisis but in this film she is portrayed as a spineless temptress who uses sex to get what she needs. In nearly every scene she is humping, aggressively, repeatedly, Nick the protagonist/antagonist of Thank You for Smoking.

Poor Katie. Her manager, agent, publicist and entourage probably wince every time the film is aligned with her name. Here she is, a young, smart woman who has to use her body to get ahead in her career. All you can picture is her and Tom Cruise going at it like fanatical bunnies trying to re-populate the earth. Let’s face it folks, Katie isn’t innocent. Let’s just hope she doesn’t hump the shark.

I just googled Katie Holmes Jumps the Shark and found a blog posting on Sic Semper Tyrannis by the exact same name. Spin doctors be alert - Katie needs a serious image makeover.

Image of Fonzy from Wikipedia.
Image of Tom Cruise - did he steal Fonzy's motorcycle?
Katie Holmes - get in touch with your inner alien.